is a very personal project in which I attempt to put together a story that meshes together my personal faith,humanity's redemption and the mysteries of God.
Because it is an attempt to make philosophical sense while still maintaining a sense of sentimentality (because despite my pretentious tone, I am trying to be sincere with my feelings) it'll
be very slow going, especially because I must be faithful to more important things as well.
if somehow, this narrative makes you curious or interested in learning what exactly this all means to me, please feel free to drop me a note (:
for the glory of Christ. thank You for putting up with no-good me.
i. it cannot exist
The boy doesn't believe in God. But when he dreams, he dreams that he is like God.
He stands in the Web of the Universe, where the infinite fates fall like raindrops, branching out in the numberless paths. (They each comprise of the stories of the worlds, as if he stood outside of space. They fall slowly, as if he stood outside of time.)
This is how he knows that he is God when he dreams.
And when he wakes, he feels a deep ache inside, as if he were stretched out more than he ought to have been. But the world that he lives in is more real than his dreams.
This why he believes that there is no God. In this dull city where nothing changes, there is no place for His existence, where every single day starts over and ends again in a cycle that is forgotten.
"In this city, words like forever cannot exist," he thinks as the days go on. And secretly he wishes his dreams were real.
The girl believes in God. The city is as indifferent towards her as it is to the boy, but she believes with all her heart that God exists.
And in her dreams, she dreams of Someone whose name she can't quite remember when she's awake. When she tries to form her lips to utter it, it feels wrong, as if the human tongue were forbidden to even speak something so wonderful.
"Come with me!" He would say to her in a dream-like dance, grasping her with a hand that is as delicate as a whisper. And she would run behind Him, laughing, not caring where He would take her. And when He smiles, she realizes that words like eternity seem so small.
She wants to tell Him so. But every night, before she gains the courage to speak to Him, she wakes up.
But that was so long ago. Now when she dreams, she dreams that she is alone. When she dreams, it begins in a Tower. The spiraling path ahead of her stretches up so far that she cannot see its end. Night after night, she runs like before, knowing in her heart that it is endless and impossible to reach for one so human.
But somehow she knows that at the very end of the stairs, He will be there.
Monday, September 13, 2010,8:13 PM |
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